Social skills support
Often people with neurodivergence and anxiety can struggle to connect with others and socialise. Often, there can be what we call ‘masking’, where a person does not feel they can be or act how they truly are around others due to concerns for being judged or even the fear they may not be liked and could be outcast or rejected. This issue is amplified in conditions such as autism and intellectual barriers, where socialising can genuinely be quite a terrifying experience!
It is important that when learning social skills, however, that we try not to get people to conform to other standards and that therapy is done in such a way that promotes a person to advocate for themselves and be who they are. This affirming (or neuroaffirming approach) has become key. Especially as the NDIS has seen increased media in the last few years.
A lot of this has been around issues with improper practice, trying to get others to conform but also noting that therapists have used improper practices, such may punish and make a person feel dehumanised. This is something we often hear out in the Central West in smaller towns such as Dubbo, West Wyalong or even Hay where there are few, to none, local supports that are affirming and designed to support a person to be who they are whilst making meaningful social connections.
Riverina Counselling aims to offer therapies that are more about helping a person to be themselves and connect with others whilst doing so. However, this can be a major challenge when social difficulties exist. Therefore, we aim to improve a client’s ability to advocate and express themselves in a way that allows them to be themselves yet still connect with peers. We do this by looking at what makes it hard for people to be themselves, their concerns ands fears, whilst also acknowledging and tapping into their innate strengths and what makes them ‘tick’ as person.
Therapy should not be about punitive or condescending practices but connecting with someone who truly wants to support someone to be able to be themselves, when and where they see it. Masking isn’t always bad, as we all do this in different contexts to different extents (think of how you may act around your parents’ vs when out with friends having a joke or laugh).
In this work, it is also important to remember the ‘social battery’ as often those with neurodivergence (including our neurodiverse clinicians!) can quickly deplete this. This is where therapy should consider ways to manage this. Such as, taking breaks between social contact, ensuring you have the skills to excuse yourself for a breather, or even taking things to manage sensory issues such as earphones to help manage noise or glasses for light (Matt uses this himself!)
This is the reason social skills work extends beyond the social skills, as it about learning to manage this in a way that suites you to connect with others and have relationships that you value and where others value you.